• @CoryBishopMusic they also really like when you say butt. not sure why they're so fascinated.
    6 min 34 sec ago
  • If you want kids to like you, just say the word. And the word is "fart." It's that simple.
    1 hour 25 min ago
  • Peeling an orange is more trouble than it's worth. It'd be a different story if cookie dough were in there...
    1 hour 34 min ago
  • My 10 yr old cousin just accidentally combined "later gator" and "no way Jose." As he walked away from me he said "See ya later Jose!"
    2 hours 7 min ago
  • I carry salt around in my pocket and hand out a grain to each person I talk to throughout the day.
    4 hours 24 min ago
  • God gave me you for the ups and downs//God gave me you for the days of doubt -@blakeshelton http://t.co/Rl8auAfQNu
    18 hours 13 min ago